Fuck Around & Find Out

What if the life you’re living right now… isn’t the full picture?

What if you’re being called into something deeper?

In this episode of Relentlessly Authentic, we open up about the real, behind-the-scenes impact of stepping into purpose—what it’s shifted within us, within our families, and the way we see life as a whole.

Because this journey isn’t just external.
 It’s internal. Energetic. Transformational.

We talk about what it actually means to live in alignment—not as an idea, but as a practice.

Letting go of attachments.
 Releasing who you thought you had to be.
 Owning your truth, even when it feels uncomfortable.

We explore the power of presence, flow, and what happens when you stop forcing life—and start moving with it.

This conversation also opens into something bigger.

Into consciousness.
 Into humanity.
 Into the shared experiences that connect all of us.

Because something is shifting.

We talk about how the next generation—our children—are coming in with a different awareness, a different level of consciousness, and what that reflects back to us.

Gaby shares her experience as a parent—how her children have become her greatest teachers, challenging her, expanding her, and stripping back the layers of societal conditioning she once believed were truth.

This episode is about zooming out.
 Seeing the bigger picture.
 And remembering what life is actually about.

If you’ve been feeling the pull to grow, to evolve, to let go of what no longer fits—this conversation will meet you there.

You’re not here to stay the same—
 you’re here to expand into something greater.

Find Rachael on Instagram @highvibeyogii

Find Gaby on Instagram @rising.monarca and @gabrielafverdusco on Tik Tok 

Transcript

SPEAKER_11 0:23

Gab, welcome back to the podcast. Grand rising, grand rising. Welcome back to Relentlessly Authentic, everybody. Welcome. We're excited to be here.

SPEAKER_10 0:34

We were just saying that like we feel so in soul alignment right now. And that is so beautiful and so fun and a feeling I want everyone to have. And I was gonna tell you, Gab, that I was at the sauna yesterday, I think. So shout out to Beam Lamp Sauna and Carrie. And the girl who like runs that sauna was like, wow, I listened to the first episode and I fucking love it. You guys are gonna take off and I was like, that's so awesome.

SPEAKER_03 1:01

That is awesome. I'm so glad that it's aligning with people, you know, that the message is getting through.

SPEAKER_10 1:09

And I think it's our synergy, Gab. Like, I think we're just the two of us together is like we're meant to be.

SPEAKER_03 1:15

For sure, for sure. Also, I wanted to say, like, I was looking at the stats or whatever, and I was so flabbergasted and so blown away and excited because there's like people in Germany, there's people in Asia and India. And I'm like, that's crazy, right? That's crazy that there's people in other parts of the country listening. I mean, it's not a huge amount of people, but it doesn't matter. I'm like, the fact that this message is getting all the way over there is enough fulfillment for me that it's like, wow, like that's amazing. That's amazing that we have technology, right? To be able to relay these messages and for people to feel our energy all across the world.

SPEAKER_10 2:00

Yeah, it's really cool. And so, like, thank you everyone for listening, for sending it to somebody, for sharing it with somebody. I really do think it makes the biggest difference. And it just really wild and really fun. And like I've said on here, like there's gonna be this little global network, which I think is just gonna be incredible, incredible, and the impact that can come. And, you know, the soul alignment that can come, I feel like to and the inspiration that I hope that brings to others to kind of find their path and find their thing and find their passion and their voice and really believe in it and trust the process. And I feel like that's what we're here to speak into. So thanks everyone for the support. And um we're excited for this episode and for more guests, more guest spots too. Yeah. So, Gabs, how has how have you kind of felt since having the like since launching the podcast? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:57

I don't know. I've just been like kind of like on cloud nine. Like initially, when I thought of starting the podcast before I even reached out to you, I had the thought, I sat with that for a while, like a couple months. And then I thought, but what would it be? Like, I had this notion that it had to be like themed or like certain theme, right? We have to talk about the same, like stay on that path, right? And then I was like, no, it doesn't. It can be like we can just get on here and have a conversation about whatever we want. But I was like, but what would I call it? Like I wanted it to be, I wanted the name to be very intentional and very rooted in my journey. And the one thing that I saw as like the common denominator in in on my journey was that I was constantly told that my story, my journey is very unique. Right? Like I've had Jess, I remember Amanda, Delicia, shout out to Jess, Delicia, love you guys. You know, all these people tell me, like, you should write a book, you should write a book. And I'm like, it's crazy, Rach, because in my mind I'm like, how is it unique? It's just my life, you know? Like, how is it unique? Right. But the more I thought about it, the more I'm like, okay, unique. What is unique? Unique is authenticity, right? Authenticity. And I thought, but I don't just want to be authentic. Like, I know. I don't want to just like that word can can stand for so many different things. Authentic this, authentic that. I want it to be something else. I want it to be something like and that's when I thought of like relentlessly, like I want to be relentlessly authentic. That's what I want. I want this this platform, this place to be a place where everybody can be relentlessly authentic. Like they can show up being who they are, wearing what they wear, acting like they act, talking like they talk, like there's gonna be no censoring of any kind. It's a safe space.

SPEAKER_10 5:07

Yeah. You know, Gab, and if you I didn't mean to interrupt you, I just like had an aha moment because I've been meeting, I've like during the week, Gab, like I'll like do breath work and be like, oh, I want to ask Gabby this on the podcast. I don't know if it's like that for you, but I was like, oh, like I want to talk about this. I have this little hit. Like, you know, breath work does that to you. So I had like a little aha like brain moment. Because I was talking to a group of women. I had a girls' brunch a few weeks back, and I was talking about the podcast, and it really resonated with a lot of these women. And one of the girls asked me this question, and I wanted to ask you this. She was like, Are you worried about your family listening to it? Are you worried about your partner listening to it? How, like, are you worried about the things that you talk about and like the backlash that's gonna come along with that? And I wondered what your feelings, thoughts, take on that was. And did that ever cross your mind when wanting to start the podcast?

SPEAKER_03 5:58

Absolutely. It did. And there's still a little bit of fear there. There's still a little bit of like, what would I say? What would I do? But and I've already had people tell me, like, well, you're not giving all the details. Well, you're not saying all your truth. And you're not, you're not like, I've had people tell me, like, you're up there like portraying that you have this life and that your life is not like there's things that you're leaving out. And I'm like, no, I'm not. I've definitely said that my life is not put together on numerous occasions on this podcast. I've definitely said that my life is falling apart.

unknown 6:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:35

Do I have to go into detail about every single little thing? No, I don't. Because I still I'm still allowed to keep certain things private, right? So there's a difference. There's a difference being authentic and putting all my business out there, right? There's a difference. I still want to have a private life, right? But I am being authentic. I've never ever came on here and been like, my life is great and like everything's just fantastic. No. Like I've said, I can I can feel great and live with joy, even in the struggle, even in the shittiness, even when my life is crumbling and falling apart. That doesn't mean that every day I wake up feeling fantastic and you know, I have this fabulous life, or that I don't struggle to pay this or to pay that, or maybe I don't struggle in a relationship with a spouse, a partner, an individual. I don't struggle as a mom showing up for my kids or having backlash from them. Like, no, that's not what this is this means. I've been very honest about that. I've been very honest about my past. I've been very honest about the fact that I don't know everything and I don't have my life all put together. That's not what this is about. This is about me showing up here no matter what, right? Like me always being all in, right? That's what this is about, no matter what. Like some days I'm not gonna be able to run, so I'm gonna have to walk. Some days I'm not gonna be able to walk, so I'm gonna have to crawl. Some days I'm not gonna be able to crawl, so I'm gonna have to like literally drag myself out of bed. But that's what this is about. Yeah doing it no matter what, showing up no matter what.

SPEAKER_05 8:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:24

And I think that people are gonna have projections, people are gonna have things to say, but I don't fucking care. You know? I don't care. And I know eventually my dad will it'll get to my dad. My mom already listens, but I've always been very honest. And, you know, there's been people that are like, well, I've had people tell me, well, you didn't talk about all the support you got when you were incarcerated. You didn't talk about the people that helped you with the kids. And I'm like, right, I'm not talking about that because I'm sharing my truth. Like, that's what this is about. This platform is for me to share my truth, for you to share your truth, for you to share your story, my that doesn't mean I haven't had support. I've said it so many times. I've had a lot of support. If it wasn't for my family support, I wouldn't be where I'm at.

SPEAKER_05 9:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:12

But I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here to talk about how I've made it this hot bar and the tools and the techniques and the modalities. And ultimately, me being relentless has been due to the work I've put in to myself. Thanks to Yes Supply. Shout out to Yes Supply for teaching us and giving us the tools, the modalities, and the thematics to learn how to get through these tough moments. That's what this is about. And yeah, there's people that are just like, oh, well, you know, you didn't say this and you didn't say that. No, I'm not, I don't have to. I this is I get to choose what I want to put out there and what I don't, right?

SPEAKER_10 9:53

I will never, I'm never gonna sugarcoat it and say, Okay, so we had a little minor technical difficulties, but we're back, baby. And yeah, we were talking about how you're allowed to like say what you want to say and own that, and also like not give every detail because I I feel like this is a platform for you to own your truth, but also to like reflect and you give the wisdom from that, right? Not to just like throw up all of like your drama, right? And like this be like us just like spilling tea, right?

SPEAKER_03 10:27

Like it's trauma dumping, right? Right. It's not trauma dumping.

SPEAKER_10 10:31

We're reflecting on the wisdom that we've learned through our experience. And in that, you know, I think people in our lives, you know, I feel this way, you know, and I think this can also be a slow, you know, a slow role, right? We want to do this podcast for a long time. So like we don't need to air every single detail right from the get-go, right? This is allowed to be a an unfolding almost of like of a story for us where we don't need to give every little minute detail of our personal lives in this exact moment. Doesn't mean that stories won't come from our reflections and our lives. But I think it's also having grace in telling those stories, right? That some of those truths aren't all of my truth, right? Like my partner's truth isn't my truth. My sister, you know, their truth is theirs, but I also have mine. And I'm allowed, that's what I know the best, right? So like that's what I'm allowed to speak about and speak into and give my truth, my ownership of like my part that I played, the reflections I have from that, and allowing that to be an honest reflection because the more we own that truth, the more empowered I think we are by it. We're less triggered. And like it also, if it needs to, it will open doors to our family or those relationships that are closest to us to have conversations. But I also think, at least for me, I'm past a lot of the really, really tough parts. I've already had a lot of those really, really hard conversations. So that way it's less triggered now. So talking about on the podcast, I can come from more of a regulated place and talk about that than coming from like a chaotic type of place and trying to talk about it. That way, if like I need to talk to my partner about something or my family about something, is in a much different type of demeanor than where I was a few years ago. And I've given enough space for that process to unfold where now I can have those conversations and it be productive than coming maybe from a past few years ago. I think it's interesting that your family has to be like, oh, well, you're not telling the whole story. Cause I feel like I've been very honest about things to like a certain degree, and given a lot of credit and a lot of like, hey, this thank you for these people who have supported me.

SPEAKER_03 12:49

And I think that everybody's gonna have their own opinions, everybody's gonna have their own projections and everybody has their own truth the way they lived it, right? Like my incarceration, that journey, I lived it, and I've told many people this, right? You guys don't understand what I went through, and you will never, because you never walked in my shoes, right? You never, you never went through it day in and day out. You can imagine, right, what it felt like. You can sympathize with me, but you didn't walk in my shoes and you don't know. And I've said this so many times, like you don't know, it's not even the incarceration that was the hardest. It's being released and having to deal with all the backlash after I already served my time, after I already dealt with my own shame of being incarcerated after seeing what I put my family, my kids, my spouse through at the time, you know, of all of that. I've had to carry that. And on top of it, I've had to deal with society's bullshit, right? Society constantly telling me that I'm not good enough or that I'm always gonna be a convicted felon or that, you know, the these things. And I think that that has been so much harder to deal with than actually being the whole incarceration and being away from my family for so long, you know? And nobody can understand that.

SPEAKER_08 14:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:16

Nobody, everybody goes to like, wow, you were incarcerated. That must have been tough being away from your kids. Yeah, that was tough. But actually, the toughest part was coming home and feeling like I was out of place.

SPEAKER_06 14:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:33

Right. It it's it's just crazy, like all the psychological trauma that comes with it, right? It's not something that heals in one or two years. It's been 15 years. There's still times when I have the nightmares, you know, of hearing the keys or hearing things, and that's what I'm saying that nobody understands, right? Nobody can understand what that's like. Waking up and being like, oh my gosh, I thought I was there again, you know?

SPEAKER_14 15:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:01

But again, I'm not even here to talk about that. I'm here to talk about how when I wake up, I'm so grateful to be home. So grateful to have the people in my life that I have, the support that I have. So grateful that I am so resilient that I've figured out a way to make it this far. Right. And the connections that I've made along the way while doing the work. Because it's very true, you guys, like when you start to become a version of yourself that you want to be, you begin to attract the right individuals into your life, you know, randomly. And it becomes your tribe, right? It becomes you, you build connections. And a lot of times those connections are so much more stronger than even family connections. As much as it sucks, like growing up, you think, oh, my family, that's my family. And I've realized the connection that I have with you, the connection that I have with Jess, like the connections that I've made along the way with different individuals, right? It's a different connection. It's more energetic. And I don't have to be right there living with you or in the same city to feel you, you know? And not too many people can say that. Not too many people can say, like, oh, I it's okay that we're far because energy that there's no distance for energy.

SPEAKER_10 16:25

I think that's one of the most special and profound things when you find those people. And it doesn't have to be family. I think that's its own kind of category, right? Of support, of connection. I think when you are, you know, really in touch with energy and really in touch with your soul, like you know what it feels like. And time really doesn't matter, right? Like in terms of those types of connections. And I think we can have the type of connection where, you know, it's not meant to last forever. And I think we have the connection to where we might be in a state of being a little bit more desperate. And then like that connection isn't really what we thought it was because we're putting our own attachment on it. But I think in terms of like soul family and soul connection, I found that when I travel. So it's like there's like a resonance in like your frequency that you don't really have words for. You don't really need to explain, but you feel it and you just feel very safe with this other person. And, you know, that I have connections like that with you. I have connections like that with people who I've met when I've traveled, where you're just at the perfect place at the perfect time, right? Where you're having that perfect moment, that perfect synchronicity, that perfect conversation, where you're both really open, right? And you're just like it's really hard to explain because it's not really logical.

SPEAKER_03 17:46

It's just and it's almost like time stops, yeah, right in that moment. Like nothing else matters. Nothing else matters in that moment, just what's happening right then and there. And because nothing else matters, like time stops and you're just like in total flow. Yeah. Right? Like, let's just enjoy this, whatever it is. Like, let's just enjoy it.

SPEAKER_10 18:08

You're very present and like that, very present is where the peace is at, right? It's like, wow, that presence is so peaceful. I have goosebumps on my body, like there's energy along my body right now because it's like you're focused and you're present. And I think that's why the podcast is so impactful for us. And this is also what I relate to like teaching yoga, is because nothing else can be on my mind, right? Other than this present moment, right? Of like what I'm gonna say next, what we're gonna do next. Like you're so single focused that allows you to be really present. And those are magical moments. And those are, I feel like the moments that like live with you forever, right? Of like, wow, that was really profound. And that's the beauty of being present and really trusting the alignment of your life because it's like those moments, it's not about anything other than being at the right place at the right time, right? There's like no other, it's not about like the job. It's a frequency, right?

SPEAKER_03 19:03

It's not the like you come into, you know, we think like it's kind of crazy, right? We think like because of movies and stuff, we think like a being in another dimension, being in another frequency, being in another timeline, all these things. We think they're like actual places, right? But they're not. It's just a different level of consciousness. It's just you're vibrating at a different frequency. And when you're vibrating at a different frequency, you will start attracting the people that are vibrating at that frequency. It's kind of like like that's why it's called your a magnetic field, and that's why it's called you being magnetic, right? Because you guys all start coming together, the people that are vibrating at that frequency. And once you find people that are on that frequency, there's like no going back because then you no longer want to be like in the mundane around the people you like you see things from up there, right? And you're like seeing all these humans running around like chickens with their heads chopped off, right? Living, like you say, mundane, living a life that is just like a rat race, right?

SPEAKER_12 20:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:13

And so that's how I feel. I feel like, wow, everybody's living a rat race, and I get to just sit here and be like, all right, you guys do that. I'm gonna do this.

SPEAKER_10 20:23

Yeah. Yeah, the only thing I can think of is like what a gift, you know, that actually is. And I don't know if you view it this way, but I think you've said it on the podcast before, where like it's almost you being incarcerated allowed you, it sucked, but it allowed you to get out of the rat race, right? It forced you, right? You're not getting a corporate job, right? Because of your background, I assume, right? And so it forces you to pluck yourself out of that matrix, right? And in that, like you're becoming more of the creator of your own reality, right? So you're taking that thing that forced you into a different timeline, right? Into a different path, into a different journey and molding and sculpting your current reality and what you choose now to believe in and the person you've had to become because of that experience. I feel similarly, like I've never I've had corporate, maybe one corporate job, but like other than that, like I have had a different path than most because I feel like most people are like doing the corporate thing, climbing the corporate ladder. And I think there is a beautiful thing to be said about that. There's a lot of safety, a lot of security, right? Like that that's awesome. And I think it's meant for some people. But I also think that there's nothing wrong for the people who are on a different path at creating and and making a different reality. And that's a part of our truth, I think, gap, right? I think a little bit in the last podcast, I feel like I'm a little bit from a different dimension. I mean, I feel like as an Aquarius, like we are here to show a different type of way. It's kind of crazy. But I know we've wanted to talk about this on the podcast too. But on the journey, it's like when you get into this world of energy and you think of the magnetic field, or you're shifting your state of consciousness, which essentially, like the non-spiritual hippie woo-woo way of saying that is like you're shifting into higher brainwave states, right? Like there's neuroscience. Right. Like these aren't, you know, we think of them, we used to think of them, I think, as spiritual hippie woo-woo. There's no science behind it, but there is actually so much science behind it. And that's the really cool part, I think, about this moment in time is that the people who need the logical, they're getting now the science. And then now you're starting to live that in your experience and see these things play out and hear it on TV and TV shows that are talking about this type of things, where it's making it more a part of our day-to-day. But you know, five years ago, I feel like it was not this open and not this like known. But again, that shift in different state of consciousness allows you to come into kind of your life with a different perspective. And as you've done the work and become really sensitive to energy, I definitely feel like this fire horse energy compared to last year is very different. And I'm in a very different place of life where I feel like I can ride this energy and it's not chaotic because fire is fire. It's chaotic. There's chaos that comes along with fire. But I feel currently like this fire is something I can ride instead of something that's going to completely like dismantle or disrupt or unground me. Absolutely. Okay, y'all. Quick pause before we get back into the episode. I want to invite you to something really special. If you've been feeling overwhelmed, overstimulated, maybe stuck in your head, or just craving a moment to slow down. This Sunday I'm hosting Yoga Laddi's Plus Picnic in the Park, a self-care experience of slow grounding movements, including yoga and Pilates with coffee, pastries, fresh air, and actual human connection afterwards. This isn't about working harder. It's about finally feeling at ease, at peace, uh calm, connected, uh yourself again. This is exactly how you start to romanticize your life. Not by waiting for everything to change, but by creating slow intentional moments just like this. I think movement in the sunshine, coffee, pastries from bolted bread, blankets, a picnic, and connection that's real. If you're willing and open to trying something new or connecting with community in real time, the link is in the show notes, show notes. I hope you come and join us. So what are you feeling around the fire horse year?

SPEAKER_03 24:51

It's a year of action. I think last year was very much. And I honestly, last year I didn't really think of the like shedding of the snake very much, but looking back, like there was so much shedding, you know? And this year definitely feels like last year was kind of the catalyst, right? For this year to be like that quantumly, right? That's what it feels like. And this year has definitely started with so much more clarity in areas that I didn't even know I needed clarity in, you know? Right. And the podcast being one of them, right? Because we started the podcast last year. We started recording last year, months and months ago. And we thought, oh, this is gonna be fun. And now it's really turned into something like, no, this is what I want to do, this is where I want to be, this is where I need my focus to be. This is what fuels me, right? This is what drives me. This gives me something fulfillment, you know, and and this is where I get to feel safe and speak my truth. And nobody has a say here, right? I get to say what I want, you get to say what we want, and we feel completely safe doing it and putting it out there. Is everybody that listens to it gonna agree? No, because we're putting it out in the 3D world, right? So there's gonna be a lot of people that are triggered by a lot of things we say, and not everybody's gonna agree to it, but it doesn't matter because everybody's gonna have their own opinions. And like I've been told so many times, opinions are like assholes. We all have them and they all stink. So, you know, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I get to say my truth, you get to share your truth, we get to show up here and have a fucking ball. And, you know, that there is people out there, and we have evidence of that now, all over the world, listening, aligning to it, relating to it. And that's enough for me. You know, I have people asking me, well, how many more listens do you need before you start getting paid? And I'm like, I don't know, and I don't care. Like, I haven't looked that up, you know, like, yeah. It blows their mind to think that that's not something I'm worried about. I'm like, yeah, no, that's not what this is about.

SPEAKER_10 27:16

And in that gap, it's almost like, again, you don't have attachment to it. So when it comes, it's like, oh, this is gonna be fucking fabulous, right? Like, because I'm in soul alignment, I'm attracting that. But is that why is that the purpose? Absolutely not. And I think that's the disconnect that people almost don't get, is that when we're attached to the outcome, it's like we miss the magic of actually feeling like aligned in it, right? Like actually feeling really fucking grounded, actually feeling like, no, this is just what I know I'm supposed to do. And I don't need more than that because that's enough for me. And when you know what that feels like, when you're devoted to that truth, like you don't need anyone else's opinion. You don't need anyone else to like agree or not agree because it doesn't fucking matter, because you feel that intuitively inside yourself. And I I'm gonna say this probably until I'm blue in the face, but like that's what I want for every single person. And that's the goal of people listening. Yeah. Like you have a soul knowing, purpose, intuition. That is your biggest technology. Like, yes, we have all the technology now that we get to put this out of the world and someone in fucking Europe and Asia are listening to this. I don't think we understand the power of that, but you have power within yourself, and that intuition, that soul is speaking to you. But if we're not regulated, if we're not in touch, if we're not in tune, if we're not tapped in, you're gonna miss all of that and you're gonna misread your triggers and your trauma as like your intuition guiding you. And that's not your intuition, right? Your intuition is quiet, it's a knowing. You don't need to logically think about it or overthink or overanalyze. You're gonna naturally move towards it. How else is that a fair description? You'll know. I feel like because you feel it, you trust it, you own it, you move with it. And there's not so much resistance, I think, because you've done a lot of the work to know, like, yeah, these things are gonna be hard, they're gonna be uncomfortable, but it doesn't fucking matter because I'm devoted. I'm devoted to this soul truth, this soul path. And I think everybody has that truth. But in that also, that doesn't mean that you need to make money off of it, right? Like your truth might be in this moment that you're a mom, and that's your truth, and that's where you're meant to be. And those are the lessons you're meant to be learning right now and going through, and owning, and honing, and learning. That is also a truth, and there doesn't need to be a money sign associated with that.

SPEAKER_03 29:51

I think what I'm hearing here, and what just actually came to me is that in anything we do, there needs to be absolutely no attachments to it. No attachment. And I believe that to be for everything, for your relationship, for your marriage, for your kids, like we need to not have attachments to the person that we marry. We need to not have attachments to our kids because eventually they're not gonna be here anymore, right? Things happen, right? Your kids grow up, they leave. Like we are, I truly believe, like, yeah, we're their parents, but we're also here more as their guides.

SPEAKER_08 30:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:37

And a lot of times our kids will show us a lot. We can learn a lot from our kids because my kids, the way they're being raised, is so different than the way I was being raised, that they don't have the programming that I had. They don't have the programming that I had. So they see things very differently and they perceive things very differently.

SPEAKER_10 31:02

Isn't that cool though? Because they're coming into our world right now at a different consciousness level than when we were born. Our consciousness level that we were born into is a much different place than we are right now. Like I think that's a perfect example of seeing how consciousness is like lifting, right? And is becoming higher. And we are kind of leaving these structures, which I do think astrology has a big piece to play in that, right? Yeah. Certain planets are in certain orbits and have certain characteristics. I think actually today is the 25th. Today's the 25th. So Uran, Uranus, Uranus is going into Gemini today. So that is a lot about power structure, how the power is coming more back to the people and less into the structures that we've had. And so again, I just think it's so interesting that if we talk about this soul level of looking at things, right? This higher perspective, that we're not in control as humans, right? Like there is something energetically that is happening that we're all tapped into, that we feel that we're feeding into, that's feeding into us, those rhythms, those seasons, those years, that magnetic force that we're coming into, you know, how interesting it is that it's being reflected to us in our kids, right? In the different kids' generations of how they are perceiving, looking, the lens they look through, the conditioning that they do and don't have. So that's incredible. And I think, Gab, if you want to talk into, you know, what an example of your kids seeing things differently than kind of you do.

SPEAKER_03 32:44

I think that uh there's many times, been many times when just an example, my daughter Viviana, she's an Aries. She's a true Aries, lots of fire, yeah. There would be times when I would be telling her, Why are you doing that? And I'd start yelling, you know, and be very being very loud. And then she'd start yelling. And I'd be like, hey, hey, hey, don't you dare talk to me like that. I'm your mom and don't forget that. You have to respect me. And she'd turn and look at me and she'd be like, Well, you have to respect me too. How do you want me to respect you if you're not respecting me? And how do you want me not to yell at you when you're sitting here yelling at me and even cursing at me sometimes? She's like, How is that respectful? And I'm like, shit, I'm kind of like, like, I get tongue-twasted because I don't even know what to say because she's right. She's 20 years old. She's not a little kid anymore. She's she's older and she's right. She deserves respect. And just because I have this programming that I believe that just because she's my daughter, she has to do as I say, not as I do. That is a belief I have, because that is a belief my dad has had instilled in me. Just for another example. Oh, I want to go here. No, you're not gonna go. Why not? Because I said no. But why did you say no? Like I want to know why. And then we'll talk about it, we'll dig into it, and it's because of a projection I had. Because at that age, I did what she was gonna do, and I got into trouble, and I went out and I did X, Y, and Z. Therefore, I'm not gonna let her go because I don't want her to do the same thing. And she makes me see my kids are very wise. Okay.

SPEAKER_06 34:35

She'll tell me, first of all, you are not grandpa and grandma, right? You are different. My dad is different.

SPEAKER_03 34:45

You guys have raised us differently. That's the first thing. Second of all, I'm not you. I'm not you.

SPEAKER_06 34:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 34:55

Third of all, you have always given me freedom where you did not have any freedom. So, yeah, there were things that you did the minute you got freedom because you were not allowed to do it otherwise, and you felt like you needed to do all these things, right? So I am not you. You are not grandpa. So therefore, the situation is not gonna be the same. You are giving me trust that I am gonna behave in a good way, that I'm gonna carry myself differently, that I am gonna, you know, make good decisions. You have to continue to trust that until I betray that trust. Once I betray that trust, she says, then you can say whatever you want, right? Then you can say no or whatever. She's like, but I haven't done that yet. You're going on a projection that you did and trying to keep me from living my life, right? But yet you're telling me I want you to be free, I want you to make your decisions. She's like, and you're kind of contradicting yourself. And so, yes, there's been many times that I've had to be like, okay, you're right. You can go, you can do this, you can do that, right? And it's her teaching me because I've taught them, right? This is what I've taught them. This is the life they get to live. I've told them, I want you guys to be free. I want you guys to be whoever you want to be, to make your choices. And they've even told me themselves, mommy, you cannot protect us from everything. You have to let us make our own mistakes in order for us to learn. You cannot come and save us every single time. Like we have to learn on our own. So there's been so many lessons that I've learned through the kids, through my kids, you know, and I continue to learn. Yesterday, my son and me were talking about this. He was talking about what I just said. Like, our kids can teach us things because they don't have the programming that we have. He said something like Kanye said something like that about North, right? Like, I listened to my daughter because she doesn't have the programming that I have growing up. So she has a different perspective. And he was talking about that. And then he's like, you know, we live in a world where like everybody's so caught up in classes, right? Like, you're not this class, you're that class, right? You're higher class, you're lower class. And he's like, even on the planes, right? There's first class, there's business class, there's no class, right? And he said, you know, Kanye has always said, like, whether you're in first class, business class, or no class, when the plane falls, everybody dies.

SPEAKER_01 37:33

It's not funny, but it's kind of funny.

SPEAKER_03 37:34

Yeah, everybody dies. It doesn't fucking matter what class you're in, right?

SPEAKER_06 37:40

Just because you're in first class doesn't mean you get to be saved. Correct. Right. And I was like, wow. My son told me that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 37:49

And so I've learned to really listen to them. Really, really listen to them. And there's a lot of times he speaks out of his ass, but a lot of times I do take these little nuggets that sometimes he says that I'm like, wow, if he's this wise at 18 years old, you know, and he has this level of wisdom at this age, I can't wait to see what he's gonna be like at 30 and 40 if he continues to do the work, continues to listen to podcasts, to listen to YouTube videos about personal development. But yeah, our journey is back to what I said at the beginning is that we are here to guide them. We have this notion that we are here to be their parents and we are here to tell them right from wrong. No, we are here to lead by example, and they are here to watch us do that, and we are here to help guide them and support them through their upbringing. Not to sit here and say you're good and you're bad and this is right and this is wrong and you should be ashamed and you know, black and white.

SPEAKER_10 38:53

It's not black and white.

unknown 38:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_10 38:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 38:56

But it's hard because the rest of the world doesn't operate like that.

SPEAKER_10 38:59

Right. And that's the mind fuck, though, I think. And like your son said, you know, when the plane goes down, we all die, right? When at the end of our life, the only thing that really is gonna matter is if you woke up every day and you were happy, truly happy, and you loved the people that you were around. There really isn't anything else other than that. And so we put all these labels on things that is just something that we've all agreed to, but isn't actually true. And I think that for me, it's like stripping back to that humanity and to that, the soul and the truth of who you really are, is a way to, I guess the what the words that are coming to mind is like put us back on all the same level, like on this all the same playing field. You know what I mean? Like we're all just human. And I read this book, it's Eckhart Tolle, actually. And he talks about the new earth, which is, I believe, what we're kind of being birthed into, right? That book is profound and he said, you know, whenever there's war on something, war on drugs, war on this, war on that, it's really just us having war within ourselves because anything that we say is bad, wrong, is only creating more division. It's only creating more judgment on each person's side. How is that helping anybody? Like, how do you find this even playing field, this even discussion, this even communication, which I really think has been broken down a lot. Because if we come back to it, we all really want the same things. It's to love our life, right? To wake up happy and joyful, to have support and resources when we struggle, to be supported, you know, and to love and have relationships around us that love and support us. I think we all really want the same thing. And when we label and judge, it's really hard to see life on that kind of scope and on that level. But that's why I think when you do meet people and you are in such resonance, it doesn't fucking matter what language they speak. It doesn't matter whether they're a family member, it doesn't matter if they live across the world because you're relating to them on an energetic human soul level, then on a, I need to know, like, you know, what's your job? What's your label? You know, are you a parent? You know, did you go to college? You know, all the the shit that we just almost don't know how to relate beyond that surface level. All the how-tos, right?

SPEAKER_03 41:18

That society has instilled for us. And like, really, what it comes down to is that life should really just be very simple. Firstly, very simple. And we've made that to be the hardest thing we can fucking do. Like we have to literally go through the hardest shit to realize how simple things really are. Right. I literally had to go to jail. I had to be diagnosed with cancer, I had to go through all these struggles with my kids, with my parents, with their dad, with family, you know. You literally had to break yourself up, be broken, right? In order to put yourself back together to realize and to see things through a whole different lens, right? And be like, oh, it's just about nature.

SPEAKER_06 42:05

It's just about heart.

SPEAKER_14 42:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 42:08

It's just about love. That's it. Yeah. You know? That's it. It's back to basics.

SPEAKER_03 42:19

That's where the magic is. But we've been programmed to think, no, we need to have a big house and a big ass TV, and we need to have a TV in every motherfucking room because why not? You know? Which we do, and it's like, do you know how many times I watch TV? I hardly ever turn on the TV, like ever, you know? It's just crazy we've we've and it's crazy for me to even say that right now because I'm having that realization right now, you know? That that's crazy. Like I used to like I I made it so that there's a TV in every single in in each one of the rooms here and my TV's all dusty.

SPEAKER_10 42:58

You know?

SPEAKER_03 42:59

Because I don't ever watch TV.

SPEAKER_10 43:00

I think honestly, Gab, we'd all be a lot happier with actually less.

SPEAKER_06 43:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_10 43:07

And it's all garbage. I mean, I'm not gonna say it's all garbage. It doesn't matter. It's fun, it's nice, it's it's like there is convenience and there is you know comfort that comes along with those things. But when it comes down to it, really.

SPEAKER_03 43:23

But it's all been, it's all been, I feel like it's all been designed that way. It's a distraction, absolutely. It's been designed for us to sit in front of the TV and just absorb all this garbage to keep us from being outside, being connected. Because being connected to the land, to the trees, to the sun, to the earth is where our power lies. And if we are disconnected from that, trapped inside the house. What happened in COVID when everybody had to be trapped inside the house? So the anxiety went up, the depression went up. I too believe that was designed that way, right? Designed that way. Right? To keep us confined, to keep us everybody was watching. I remember telling my spouse, like, can you turn off the TV? At the time, you know, he kept saying they're gonna enforce martial law, martial law, martial law. And watching the news over and over and over. I'm like, oh my gosh, this is driving me crazy. Like, I can't watch this anymore.

SPEAKER_05 44:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 44:26

I cannot watch this anymore. So I started running in the morning. You know, I would get up, get dressed, and run. I started running for two miles. Eventually I got to six miles and I started making my kids go with me. I'd take all their phones away before they woke up and I'd be like, You want your phone back? Get up. Let's go running. And I made them go. They wouldn't run, but some of them would run, some of them would walk, but they'd walk and they'd be outside.

SPEAKER_13 44:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 44:51

Because it was driving me crazy. It was driving me insane. And I remember I had one of my first aha moments at that time. I was running by myself. Really beautiful, actually. And I was running and I was feeling anxiety at the time. I had already started not feeling very happy about where my relationship was, my marriage was. And I was feeling lots of anxiety. Cause I think COVID did that, right? COVID caused like you were stuck with people inside the house. So you got to see different sides of them, right? You got to, you were confined. So there was a lot of frustration, a lot of irritation. And that's kind of where I, where I was, right? I felt very frustrated and irritated and just like I needed, I wanted, I would like I'm suffocating. I need to be out. So I went for a run that day, I remember. And as I was running back home, I was crying. Like I got to the point. And running would do that for me, right? Running would make me start crying because I couldn't do it on my own. So I'd run and run and I'd be listening to music or a podcast. I think back then it was like Rachel Hollis and her husband, Dave Hollis, at the time. And I'd listen to them. They were talking about relationships and all this stuff. And I stopped because I couldn't catch my breath anymore because I was crying so much. And I stopped and I just sat on the cement and I was crying and crying. And I looked to my left and I saw a butterfly. I think it was a monarch. And they kept trying to fly. It kept trying to fly and it kept getting like falling and falling and falling. And I was like, what's going on? So I went over there and there was a bunch of ants on it. Like all these ants on it, you know, just climbing all over it. And I saw that and I grabbed a leaf and I tried to like blow the ants off of it. And I put it on the like a bush or whatever. And I sat there and observed it for a good 15-20 minutes. And then it finally flew away. And I cried so much. And I thought, that poor butterfly. That's exactly how I feel. Like I just want to fly. I just want to fly. But all these things are just like weighing me down, you know? Weighing me down. And I remember it flying away and thinking that's a sign. That's a sign that like I need to, I need to do whatever I need to do in order for me to be able to fly. You know?

SPEAKER_10 47:24

Butterfly.

SPEAKER_03 47:25

I remember looking it up and being like, oh, butterflies are a sign of transformation.

SPEAKER_10 47:28

Oh my gosh, I love that. That is such a beautiful story. Like, holy shit. I like to call those moments like God moments, where it's like, that's a God moment. God's present. Like magic's present, energy's present, universe is present. Like that was a God moment.

SPEAKER_03 47:43

And I think shortly after that, like maybe a couple weeks after that, I really started to like dive deep into personal development and start to like look. My sister had already been telling me to look for a life coach. And I found my very first life coach and really like started to dive deep into that. And I thought, like these moments, right, in our life that we think that would if we don't pay attention, right? Like if I would have just ran, kept running and ran past that, I would have never saw it. But there's a reason you they are God moments, right? There's a reason I sat in that moment and I cried in that moment. And I looked to my left and saw that butterfly. For both of us, there was reason for both of us, right? For me to see witness its like majesticness, right? And for it, for me to be able to help it fly, right? There was an energy exchange there with us. And ever since then, the monarch, my coaching business, it's it's monarch in Spanish, it's monarca. Ever since then, I've had this connection with butterflies ever since then, because they are just like think about their life. Think about how much courage it takes for the caterpillar to transform into that butterfly. Right? It has to go through pain, it has to go through like a rebirth, it has to go through all of this to become a butterfly, to be free, free for maybe two weeks before it dies.

SPEAKER_06 49:15

Yeah. And that's our life. Like think about how long we've how long I've spent, you've spent living in survival.

SPEAKER_03 49:25

Right. How long we've spent living in survival. There's people that lived this way for years, like 50, 60, 70 years, you know? And they get to the end of their journey, the last few months of their life, and they they have finally this moment where they're like, nothing matters. I just want to be happy.

SPEAKER_12 49:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 49:46

It doesn't matter what brand I have on. It doesn't matter how much money's in the bank. Nothing matters because when you die, a U-Haul is not behind you. Yeah, it's not coming with you when you're gone. Right? Nothing matters. And that's how I see that's why the butterfly is so significant. Because I'm like, no, like we need to do this now. Like that that's why I'm in the space I'm at where I'm like, whatever. Let's just try it all, right?

SPEAKER_09 50:15

Let's see where something's gonna fit all.

SPEAKER_03 50:17

Yeah. There's gonna be a puzzle that is gonna go in that space that's missing.

SPEAKER_09 50:21

That's meant to.

SPEAKER_03 50:22

And I'm not gonna figure it out by sitting here trying to trying to get a nine to five, right? Trying to force myself to live a life that just wasn't meant for me. I know that.

SPEAKER_05 50:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:36

I've tried it. I did it.

SPEAKER_05 50:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:39

I did it for so long. And this is truly why I feel like I haven't been able to find that full-time job that I've been in so search for for a fucking year, right? I haven't found it because it's not meant for me to be here. It's not meant for me to be doing that work anymore.

SPEAKER_12 50:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:55

I'm meant for this. I'm meant to share my truth in whichever way it is. I don't know how it's gonna be. Is it gonna be speaking? Is it gonna be coaching? Is it gonna be through the podcast? Is it gonna be me doing retreats with you? Is it gonna be like, I don't know. But I'm gonna follow, I'm gonna fuck around and find out. But I'm gonna follow my feeling. I'm gonna follow because I know I didn't get this far to just get this far. Right.

SPEAKER_10 51:21

Well, it's like you trust it more. It's like you're finally just like choosing that I'm gonna trust this. I'm gonna trust this feeling. I'm gonna trust myself. I'm gonna trust the universe. I'm gonna believe that something has my back and I'm gonna live in that place and operate from that place. I'm gonna fuck around and find out and see where that leads me instead of doing it the way everyone told me I should or the ways that I thought I had to, right? Like instead of living from that place, I'm actually gonna live from this more surrendered flow, take action. So it's feminine and masculine, right? But I'm gonna live more from that heart-centered, soul-aligned place, and I'm gonna fuck around and find out and see what happens. And I bet, Gab, you're gonna be lead you to exactly where you're meant to be, and it's all gonna be maybe moving into a thriving era.

SPEAKER_03 52:08

And I just want to tell my family don't worry about me. I'm gonna be fine. I promise it's been hard. But honestly, my life has always been hard. Ever since I became a mom, raising three young children all around the same age and just being devoted to them, to their dad, feeling that even then I felt like that was just what I needed to do. It wasn't what I always wanted to do. It didn't feel aligned, but that's what I felt I needed to do because of the programming, because of what I was taught. That was the right thing to do always. And I loved being a mom. I loved it, but it was hard. It was hard. Now my kids are grown up. You know, my third one's about to be off to go to college. I just have my youngest who just turned 14 a couple days ago. And I feel like I feel like now I get to do more for myself. You know, I feel like now I get to, I get to fuck around and find out, you know?

unknown 53:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 53:06

Because I uh what I won't do is sit around another 20 years and think of what if what if, yes, like Will said, I rather I rather not do the what if and I'd rather do the even if, right? Even if it doesn't work out. That's faith.

SPEAKER_06 53:23

Right? Even if it doesn't work out, I'll learn something from it. Yeah. You know? I love that.

SPEAKER_10 53:31

I love that. And I I'm excited because we're gonna everyone, I'm gonna be along for the ride and the journey cab and what a uh an honor and pleasure that is. And listeners, if they've been listening to us from the beginning, they're gonna be along for that journey. And I think that's really fucking powerful and really fucking cool. And so I'm excited to fuck around and find out. I feel like that should be the name of this episode.

SPEAKER_03 53:55

Seriously, right? Should be the the name of the episode for sure.

SPEAKER_10 53:59

Yeah, I think that's hilarious. But until next time, Gab, I know you've got to run until next time. I love you. Thanks everybody for tuning. And we'll we'll connect soon. Catch you on the next one. Bye. Out of the world, and someone in fucking Europe and Asia are listening to this. I don't think we understand the power of that, but you have power within yourself, and that intuition, that soul is speaking to you. But if we're not regulated, if we're not in touch, if we're not in tune, if we're not tapped in, you're gonna miss all of that, and you're gonna misread your triggers and your trauma as like your intuition guiding you, and that's not your intuition, right? Your intuition is quiet, it's a knowing. You don't need to logically think about it or overthink or overanalyze. You're gonna naturally move towards it. How is that a fair description? You'll know. I feel like because you feel it, you trust it, you own it, you move with it. And there's not so much resistance, I think, because you've done a lot of the work to know, like, yeah, these things are gonna be hard, they're gonna be uncomfortable, but it doesn't fucking matter because I'm devoted. I'm devoted to this soul truth, this soul path. And I think everybody has that truth. But in that also, that doesn't mean that you need to make money off of it, right? Like your truth might be in this moment that you're a mom, and that's your truth, and that's where you're meant to be. And those are the lessons you're meant to be learning right now and going through, and owning, and honing, and learning. That is also a truth, and there doesn't need to be a money sign associated with that.

SPEAKER_03 55:42

I think what I'm hearing here, and what just actually came to me is that in anything we do, there needs to be absolutely no attachments to it. No attachment. And I believe that to be for everything, for your relationship, for your marriage, for your kids. Like, we need to not have attachments to the person that we marry. We need to not have attachments to our kids. Because eventually they are not gonna be here anymore, right? Things happen, right? Your kids grow up, they leave. Like we are, I truly believe, like, yeah, we're their parents, but we're also here more as their guides.

SPEAKER_08 56:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 56:26

And a lot of times our kids will show us a lot. We can learn a lot from our kids because my kids, the way they're being raised, is so different than the way I was being raised, that they don't have the programming that I had. They don't have the programming that I had. So they see things very differently and they perceive things very differently.

SPEAKER_10 56:51

Isn't that cool though? Because they're coming into our world right now at a different consciousness level than when we were born. Our consciousness level that we were born into is a much different place than we are right now. Like I think that's a perfect example of seeing how consciousness is like lifting, right? And is becoming higher. And we are kind of leaving these structures, which I do think astrology has a big piece to play in that, right? Certain planets are in certain orbits and have certain characteristics. I think actually today is the 25th. Today's the 25th. So Uran Uranus, Uranus is going into Gemini today. So that is a lot about power structure, how the power is coming more back to the people and less into the structures that we've had. And so again, I just think it's so interesting that if we talk about this soul level of looking at things, right? This higher perspective, that we're not in control as humans, right? Like there is something energetically that is happening that we're all tapped into, that we feel that we're feeding into, that's feeding into us, those rhythms, those seasons, those years, that magnetic force that we're coming into, you know, how interesting it is that it's being reflected to us in our kids, right? In the different kids' generations of how they are perceiving, looking, the lens they look through, the conditioning that they do and don't have. So that's incredible. And I think, Gab, if you want to talk into, you know, what an example of your kids seeing things differently than kind of you do.

SPEAKER_03 58:34

I think that uh there's many times, been many times when just an example, my daughter Viviana, she's an Aries. She's a true Aries, lots of fire, yeah. There would be times when I would be telling her, Why are you doing that? And I'd start yelling, you know, and be very being very loud. And then she'd start yelling. And I'd be like, hey, hey, hey, don't you dare talk to me like that. I'm your mom and don't forget that. You have to respect me. And she'd turn and look at me and she'd be like, Well, you have to respect me too. How do you want me to respect you if you're not respecting me? And how do you want me not to yell at you when you're sitting here yelling at me and even cursing at me sometimes? She's like, How is that respectful? And I'm like, shit, I'm kind of like, like, I get tongue-twisted or I don't even know what to say because she's right. She's 20 years old. She's not a little kid anymore. She's she's older and she's right. She deserves respect. And just because I have this programming that I believe that just because she's my daughter, she can she has to do as I say, not as I do. That is a belief I have, because that is a belief my dad has had instilled in me. Just for another example. Oh, I want to go here. No, you're not gonna go. Why not? Because I said no. But why did you say no? Like I want to know why. And then we'll talk about it, we'll dig into it, and it's because of a projection I had. Because at that age, I did what she was gonna do, and I got into trouble, and I went out and I did X, Y, and Z. Therefore, I'm not gonna let her go because I don't want her to do the same thing. And she makes me see, my kids are very wise. Okay. She'll tell me, first of all, you are not grandpa and grandma, right? You are different. My dad is different. You guys have raised us differently. That's the first thing.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:41

Second of all, I'm not you. I'm not you. Okay. Third of all, you have always given me freedom.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:50

Where you did not have any freedom. So yeah, there were things that you did the minute you got freedom because you were not allowed to do it otherwise, and you felt like you needed to do all these things, right? So I am not you. You are not grandpa. So therefore, the situation is not gonna be the same. You are giving me trust that I am gonna behave in a good way, that I'm gonna carry myself differently, that I am gonna, you know, make good decisions. You have to continue to trust that until I betray that trust. Once I betray that trust, she says, then you can say whatever you want, right? Then you can say no or whatever. She's like, but I haven't done that yet. You're going on a projection that you did and trying to keep me from living my life, right? But yet you're telling me I want you to be free, I want you to make your decisions. She's like, and you're kind of contradicting yourself. And so, yes, there's been many times that I've had to be like, okay, you're right. You can go, you can do this, you can do that, right? And it's her teaching me because I've taught them, right? This is what I've taught them. This is the life they get to live. I've told them, I want you guys to be free. I want you guys to be whoever you want to be, to make your choices. And they've even told me themselves, mommy, you cannot protect us from everything. You have to let us make our own mistakes in order for us to learn. You cannot come and save us every single time. Like we have to learn on our own. So there's been so many lessons that I've learned through the kids, through my kids, you know, and I continue to learn. Yesterday, my son and me were talking about this. He was talking about what I just said. Like, our kids can teach us things because they don't have the programming that we have. He said something like Kanye said something like that about North, right? Like, I listened to my daughter because she doesn't have the programming that I have growing up. So she has a different perspective. And he was talking about that. And then he's like, you know, we live in a world where like everybody's so caught up in classes, right? Like, you're not this class, you're that class, right? You're higher class, you're lower class. And he's like, even on the planes, right? There's first class, there's business class, there's no class, right? And he said, you know, Kanye has always said, like, whether you're in first class, business class, or no class, when the plane falls, everybody dies.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:23

It's not funny, but it's kind of funny.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:25

Yeah, everybody dies. It doesn't fucking matter what class you're in, right? Just because you're in first class doesn't mean you get to be saved.

SPEAKER_06 1:03:33

Correct. Right. And I was like, wow. But my son told me that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:40

And so I've learned to really listen to them. Really, really listen to them. And there's a lot of times he speaks out of his ass, but a lot of times I do take these little nuggets that sometimes he says that I'm like, wow, if he's this wise at 18 years old, you know, and he has this level of wisdom at this age, I can't wait to see what he's gonna be like at 30 and 40 if he continues to do the work, continues to listen to podcasts, to listen to YouTube videos about personal development. But yeah, our journey is back to what I said at the beginning is that we are here to guide them. We have this notion that we are here to be their parents and we are here to tell them right from wrong. No, we are here to lead by example, and they are here to watch us do that, and we are here to help guide them and support them through their upbringing. Not to sit here and say you're good and you're bad and this is right and this is wrong and you should be ashamed and you know, black and white. It's not black and white.

SPEAKER_10 1:04:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:04:45

But it's hard because the rest of the world doesn't operate like that.

SPEAKER_10 1:04:49

Right. And that's the mind fuck, though, I think. And like your son said, you know, when the plane goes down, we all die, right? When at the end of our life, the only thing that really is gonna matter is if you woke up every day and you were happy, truly happy, and you loved the people that you were around. There really isn't anything else other than that. And so we put all these labels on things that is just something that we've all agreed to, but isn't actually true. And I think that for me, it's like stripping back to that humanity and to that, the soul and the truth of who you really are, is a way to, I guess the what the words that are coming to mind is like put us back on all the same level, like on this all the same playing field. You know what I mean? Like we're all just human. And I I read this book, it's Eckhart Tolle actually. And he talks about the new earth, which is, I believe, what we're kind of being birthed into, right? That book is profound and he said, you know, whenever there's war on something, war on drugs, war on this, war on that, it's really just us having war within ourselves because anything that we say is bad, wrong, is only creating more division.

unknown 1:05:59

It's only

SPEAKER_10 1:06:00

Creating more judgment on each person's side. How is that helping anybody? Like, how do you find this even playing field, this even discussion, this even communication, which I really think has been broken down a lot? Because if we come back to it, we all really want the same things. It's to love our life, right? To wake up happy and joyful, to have support and resources when we struggle, to be supported, you know, and to love and have relationships around us that love and support us. I think we all really want the same thing. And when we label and judge, it's really hard to see life on that kind of scope and on that level. But that's why I think when you do meet people and you are in such resonance, it doesn't fucking matter what language they speak. It doesn't matter whether they're a family member. It doesn't matter if they live across the world because you're relating to them on an energetic human soul level than on a I need to know, like, you know, what's your job? What's your label? You know, are you a parent? You know, did you go to college? You know, all the shit that we just almost don't know how to relate beyond that surface level. All the how-tos, right?

SPEAKER_03 1:07:07

That society has instilled for us. And like, really, what it comes down to is that life should really just be very simple. For sure. Very simple. And we've made that to be the hardest thing we can fucking do. Like we have to literally go through the hardest shit to realize how simple things really are. Right. I literally had to go to jail. I had to be diagnosed with cancer. I had to go through all these struggles with my kids, with my parents, with their dad, with family, you know. You literally had to break yourself up, be broken, right? In order to put yourself back together to realize and to see things through a whole different lens, right? And be like, oh, it's just about nature. It's just about heart.

SPEAKER_14 1:07:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 1:07:57

It's just about love. That's it. Yeah. You know? That's it.

SPEAKER_03 1:08:05

It's back to basics. That's where the magic is. But we've been programmed to think, no, we need to have a big house and a big ass TV, and we need to have a TV in every motherfucking room because why not? You know? Which we do. And it's like, do you know how many times I watch TV? I hardly ever turn on the TV, like ever, you know? It's just crazy. We've we've and it's crazy for me to even say that right now because I'm having that realization right now, you know? That that's crazy. Like I used to like I I made it so that there's a TV in every single in in each one of the rooms here and my TV's all dusty.

SPEAKER_10 1:08:47

You know?

SPEAKER_03 1:08:48

Because I don't ever watch TV.

SPEAKER_10 1:08:49

I think honestly, Gab, we'd all be a lot happier with actually less. Yeah. And because it's all garbage. I mean, I'm not gonna say it's all garbage. It doesn't matter. It's fun, it's nice, it's it's like there is convenience and there is, you know, comfort that comes along with those things.

SPEAKER_03 1:09:10

But when it comes down to it, really But it's all been it's all been, I feel like it's all been designed that way. It's a distraction, absolutely. It's been designed for us to sit in front of the TV and just absorb all this garbage to keep us from being outside, being connected. Because being connected to the land, to the trees, to the sun, to the earth is where our power lies. And if we are disconnected from that, trapped inside the house. What happened in COVID when everybody had to be trapped inside the house? So the anxiety went up, the depression went up. I too believe that was designed that way, right? Designed that way. Right? To keep us confined, to keep us. Everybody was watching. I remember telling my spouse, like, can you turn off the TV? At the time, you know, he kept saying they're gonna enforce martial law, martial law, martial law. And watching the news over and over and over, I'm like, oh my gosh, this is driving me crazy. Like, I can't watch this anymore. Yeah. I cannot watch this anymore. So I started running in the morning. You know, I would get up, get dressed, and run. I started running for two miles. Eventually I got to six miles and I started making my kids go with me. I'd take all their phones away before they woke up and they'd be like, You want your phone back? Get up, let's go running. And I made them go. They wouldn't run, but some of them would run, some of them would walk, but they'd walk because they'd be outside.

SPEAKER_13 1:10:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:10:39

Because it was driving me crazy. It was driving me insane. And I remember I had one of my first aha moments at that time. I was running by myself. Really beautiful, actually. And I was running and I was feeling anxiety at the time. I had already started not feeling very happy about where my relationship was, my marriage was. And I was feeling lots of anxiety because I think COVID did that, right? COVID caused like you were stuck with people inside the house. So you got to see different sides of them, right? You got to, you were confined. So there was a lot of frustration, a lot of irritation. And that's kind of where I, where I was, right? I felt very frustrated and irritated and just like I needed, I wanted, I would like I'm suffocating. I need to be out. So I went for a run that day, I remember. And as I was running back home, I was crying. Like I got to the point, and running would do that for me, right? Running would make me start crying because I couldn't do it on my own. So I'd run and run, and I'd be listening to music or a podcast. I think back then it was like Rachel Hollis and her husband, Dave Hollis, at the time. And I'd listen to them. They were talking about relationships and all this stuff. And I stopped because I couldn't catch my breath anymore because I was crying so much. And I stopped and I just sat on the cement and I was crying and crying. And I looked to my left and I saw a butterfly. I think it was a monarch. And they kept trying to fly. It kept trying to fly and it kept getting like falling and falling and falling. And I was like, what's going on? So I went over there and there was a bunch of ants on it. Like all these ants on it, you know, just climbing all over it. And I saw that and I grabbed a leaf and I tried to like blow the ants off of it. And I put it on on the like a bush or whatever. And I sat there and observed it for a good 15-20 minutes. And then it finally flew away. And I cried so much. And I thought, that poor butterfly. That's exactly how I feel. Like I just want to fly. I just want to fly. But all these things are just like weighing me down, you know? Weighing me down. And I remember it flying away and thinking that's a sign. That's a sign that like I need to, I need to do whatever I need to do in order for me to be able to fly. You know? Butterfly. I remember looking it up and being like, oh, butterflies are a sign of transformation.

SPEAKER_10 1:13:15

Oh my gosh, I love that. That is such a beautiful story. Like, holy shit. I like to call those moments like God moments, where it's like, that's a God moment. God's present. Like magic's present, energy's present, universe is present. Like that was a God moment.

SPEAKER_03 1:13:29

And I think shortly after that, like maybe a couple weeks after that, I really started to like dive deep into personal development and start to like look. My sister had already been telling me to look for a life coach. And I found my very first life coach and really like started to dive deep into that. And I thought, like these moments, right, in our life that we think that would, if we don't pay attention, right? Like if I would have just ran, kept running and ran past that, I would have never seen it. But there's a reason you they are God moments, right? There's a reason I sat in that moment and I cried in that moment. And I looked to my left and saw that butterfly. For both of us, there was reasons for both of us, right? For me to see witness its like majesticness, right? And for it, for me to be able to help it fly, right? There was an energy exchange there with us. And ever since then, the monarch, my coaching business, it's monarch in Spanish, it's monarca. Ever since then, I've had this connection with butterflies, ever since then, because they are just like think about their life. Think about how much courage it takes for the caterpillar to transform into that butterfly. Right? It has to go through pain, it has to go through like a rebirth, it has to go through all of this to become a butterfly, to be free, free for maybe two weeks before it dies.

SPEAKER_06 1:15:02

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:04

And that's our life. Like think about how long we've how long I've spent, you've spent living in survival. Right. How long we've spent living in survival. There's people that lived this way for years, like 50, 60, 70 years, you know? And they get to the end of their journey, the last few months of their life, and they they have finally this moment where they're like, nothing matters. I just want to be happy. Yeah. It doesn't matter what brand I have on. It doesn't matter how much money's in the bank. Nothing matters because when you die, a U-Haul is not behind you. Yeah, it's not coming with you when you're gone. Right? Nothing matters. And that's how I see that's why the butterfly is so significant. Because I'm like, no, like we need to do this now. Like that that's why I'm in this place that I'm at where I'm like, whatever. Let's just try it all, right? Let's see what you know. There's gonna be a puzzle that is gonna go in that space that's missing.

SPEAKER_09 1:16:08

That's meant to, you know.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:09

And I'm not gonna figure it out by sitting here trying to trying to get a nine to five, right? Trying to force myself to live a life that just wasn't meant for me. I know that. Yeah. I've tried it, I did it.

SPEAKER_05 1:16:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:26

I did it for so long. And this is truly why I feel like I haven't been able to find that full-time job that I've been in so search for for a fucking year, right? I haven't found it because it's not meant for me to be here. It's not meant for me to be doing that work anymore.

SPEAKER_12 1:16:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:16:42

I'm meant for this. I'm meant to share my truth in whichever way it is. I don't know how it's gonna be. Is it gonna be speaking? Is it gonna be coaching? Is it gonna be through the podcast? Is it gonna be me doing retreats with you? Is it gonna be like, I don't know. But I'm gonna follow, I'm gonna fuck around and find out. But I'm gonna follow my feeling. I'm gonna follow because I know I didn't get this far to just get this far.

SPEAKER_10 1:17:07

Right. Well, it's like you trust it more. It's like you're finally just like choosing that I'm gonna trust this, I'm gonna trust this feeling, I'm gonna trust myself, I'm gonna trust the universe, I'm gonna believe that something has my back, and I'm gonna live in that place and operate from that place. I'm gonna fuck around and find out and see where that leads me instead of doing it the way everyone told me I should or the ways that I thought I had to, right? Like instead of living from that place, I'm actually gonna live from this more surrendered flow, take action. So it's feminine and masculine, right? But I'm gonna live more from that heart-centered, soul-aligned place, and I'm gonna fuck around and find out and see what happens. And I bet, Gab, you're gonna be lead you to exactly where you're meant to be, and it's all gonna be. Maybe moving into a thriving era.

SPEAKER_03 1:17:55

And I just want to tell my family don't worry about me. I'm gonna be fine. I promise. It's been hard. But honestly, my life has always been hard. Ever since I became a mom, raising three young children all around the same age, and just being devoted to them, to their dad, feeling that even then I felt like that was just what I needed to do. It wasn't what I always wanted to do. It didn't feel aligned, but that's what I felt I needed to do because of the programming, because of what I was taught. That was the right thing to do always. And I loved being a mom. I loved it, but it was hard. It was hard. Now my kids are grown up. You know, my third one's about to be off to go to college. I just have my youngest who just turned 14 a couple days ago. And I feel like I feel like now I get to do more for myself. You know, I feel like now I get to, I get to fuck around and find out. You know?

SPEAKER_06 1:18:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:53

Because I uh what I won't do is sit around another 20 years and think of what if what if, yes, like Will said, I rather I rather not do the what if and I rather do the even if, right? Even if it doesn't work out. That's faith. Right? Even if it doesn't work out, I'll learn something from it.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:12

Yeah. You know?

SPEAKER_10 1:19:16

I love that. I love that. And I I'm excited because we're gonna everyone, I'm gonna be along for the ride and the journey gab and what a an honor and pleasure that is. And listeners, if they've been listening to us from the beginning, they're gonna be along for that journey. And I think that's really fucking powerful and really fucking cool. And so I'm excited to fuck around and find out. I feel like that should be the name of this episode.

SPEAKER_03 1:19:42

Seriously, right? Should be the name of the episode for sure.

SPEAKER_10 1:19:46

Yeah, I think that's hilarious. But until next time, Gab, I know you've got to run. Until next time. I love you. Thanks everybody for looking at and we'll we'll connect soon. Catch on the next one.

SPEAKER_06 1:19:58

Bye.

SPEAKER_10 1:20:02

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